“It’s a big decision that I’m really proud of. That overrides any kind of physical insecurity that I have.” 

Molly was 20 when she had a risk-reducing double mastectomy and implant reconstruction because she had a BRCA pathogenic variant (gene mutation). 

Now 22 and studying musical theatre, Molly is still adjusting to the physical and emotional changes after surgery. At the heart of her story is the confidence she found in making the choice that felt right for her future. 

Being told you’re too young to get tested 

Molly first learned about inherited cancer risk at school. She decided to have genetic testing at 18 because her mum had breast cancer, was BRCA positive, and cancer had affected her wider family.  

“They just couldn’t understand why I would want to get tested. They were like, ‘Why? You’re too young, this is just silly.’” 

Molly was used to being dismissed. “Even when I was getting breast checks, I wasn’t taken very seriously. They were like, ‘No, no, no, no. This is a future issue. This is just not an issue for you.’”  

Knowing your BRCA status can give you choices 

“Before I got told that I was positive, I wasn’t scared. I didn’t feel particularly anxious,” Molly says. “Being told that you’re positive for the gene, feels like an opportunity to kind of take your health into your own hands. And that to me felt really, really empowering.”  

She knew she wanted a mastectomy but waited a couple of years while she started studying musical theatre. Her reason was clear: “This is my chance to change the outcome for me.” 

Not seeing bodies like yours  

Before surgery, Molly was more afraid of the operation itself than how her body would look. “I was terrified. I knew I had to do it. I was just scared of the surgery.” 

When it came to reconstruction, she had little to compare herself to. She hadn’t seen examples of younger women like her having preventative surgery. “The reference photos that I had didn’t mirror any scenario close to my own. I had only seen images of women who were probably like 40 years older than me and had breast cancer.” 

Seeing your body after surgery 

The first time Molly saw her breasts after her surgery was unfamiliar and surprising. They felt “foreign” at first. “I remember being in the hospital bed and looking down my shirt, I was like, ‘God, those look weird.’ And they had all these tubes in them that I had no idea would be there.” 

She knew she would lose sensation. She didn’t expect how strange it would feel. “If people touch them, I can’t feel it, but I can feel the pressure. And they do change colour with the temperature, which I didn’t expect.” She’s also experienced rippling and discomfort with touch, including from enthusiastic huggers such as her brother. “He loves a tackle, and I’m like, mate, please.” 

Molly also had to adjust to how her body felt when she danced. “That was a little bit of an adjustment because it was physically quite uncomfortable because of the bouncing sensation.” 

Dating when your body feels hard to explain 

Molly says dating has felt difficult since surgery. “I haven’t dated because I’m too scared for anyone to see them. And maybe I’m scared for what they’re going to say.” She also worries about having to explain the story behind her surgery. “Where do I even start? I’ve got to go way back and explain this whole thing. And I don’t love a pity party. So that feels daunting.” 

“Even with my friends, they don’t get it. Like when I say I’m scared to date, they’re like, ‘Oh, you’ll be fine.’ I’m like, yeah, I’m really terrified.” 

Molly’s body is part of her work and study, and she’s aware of how others may view her appearance. “I feel like people have made that assumption of, ‘Oh, she just has implants.’” 

Confidence beyond appearance 

Surgery has changed how Molly sees herself. She now has a confidence that comes from knowing what she chose and what she’s been through. “If I’m having a bad day, I’m like, oh yeah, but you know, you did this thing — like, that’s great.” 

“I can’t even remember what my breasts look like beforehand. This is just kind of what they look like now and I’m really comfortable and quite confident in that.” 

In some ways, she feels surgery has given her a different sense of who she is. “I feel a little bit more womanly. Overnight I just felt a bit more of an adult.” 

When it becomes part of who you are 

Looking back, Molly wishes she’d seen more photographs of young women having risk-reducing surgery. She also believes personal stories can help the decision feel less clinical, “because it’s bigger than that”. 

“The decision that I made is deeper than the physical outcome. I feel like how I see myself has been completely turned on its head.” 

Molly’s surgery has become part of her, without taking away who she is. “I really love that it’s just another layer to who I am.”